A survivor’s Story
As an Associate Facilitator for moMENtum, I have been working in CSA recovery for 3 years and recognised the need for creative expression for survivors. The very nature of survival strips a lot of a survivors life down to bare basics. One becomes focused on avoiding pain, overriding almost all other aspects of life. It was only after disclosure that I was able to return to the art I enjoyed in childhood. I have found through my work that many survivors miss opportunities more widely to express themselves, but specifically they miss opportunities to express themselves through creativity. This is not for a lack of creativity, each man I have met through moMENtumn is deeply creative but through survival have been denied opportunities to express this.
Art unblocked a lot of my emotions.
I drew this piece to explain my experiences of disassociation, I’m detached from both my surroundings but also my reflection (no reflection present in the water) to highlight the detachment from both myself in the present moment but also my discomfort in my current body
In my own recovery from addiction and CSA, access to the arts allowed me to express my feelings when I did not have the words to articulate them. I have also used art in the form of my comics to discuss issues with provision of care and justice for survivors. During my Fine Art and Illustration course at Plymouth College of Art, my sole focus was on catharsis, as I was my own audience and I wanted to use it as an emotional decongestant and it did! Art unblocked a lot of my emotions. However, this brought up different feelings in my audiences, while the media I produced could be cathartic for some, it was the process of making the art that gave me the real catharsis. Even now, when I struggle I turn to art even in the form of illustrations that are just for me, it helps to take difficult feelings and put them onto paper and I can be with them. This appreciation of how life saving creative expression can be is what brought me to Focused Light. I want to help others to express their outrage, pain, joy, and pride in recovery and this is why I decided to join Focused Light as a Director.
Art & text by Ezra Rickman.
